vorosmccracken.com

The U.S. U-23 National Team came away with a very disappointing 1-1 draw versus Cuba last night in Tampa in Olympic-Qualifying. The U.S. team still has two more games in the group stage, the top two in the group move on to the semi-finals. The winners of the semi-final matches head to China later this summer.

This was a fantastic result for the Cubans, and how did five members celebrate? They’ve fled!! The assumption when this happens with Cuban athletes in this country is that they have chosen to defect. My theory is that an unholy duo of Drew Peterson and Joran Van Der Sloot have kidnapped the players and are keeping them chained in a dungeon along with Stacy Peterson, Natalie Holloway, Jimmy Hoffa, the Lindbergh Baby and Chuck Knoblauch. Hopefully Greta Van Whatever will read this and I’ll be on Fox News tonight to explain my theory.